As I chatted with one of my youth after service this morning, she told me she was tired and hadn’t really had a break during school holidays and was trying to power through to the end of the school year.
“It’s just a little bit longer; I can make it,” she assured me.
“I said that for 20 years before I realised some part of it was me,” I assured her.
I’ve had another whirlwind week. That’s just my life, though. Part of me is always exhausted thinking it will slow down soon. The thing is, I thought my last trip to America was the last hurdle of the year, but while I was there, my landlord gave me 90 days notice that she was selling my house. I didn’t have time to process that while in the busyness of travel, but once home, I’ve been slammed with the implications and taken some heavy action steps.
Some readers might remember the months long search for this accessible option in my neighbourhood – I spent more than 90 days looking for it, and it’s been beyond amazing for me personally and for ministry opportunities. Last Sunday’s sermon was on Jesus calming the storm and the healing of the demon possessed man, and I heard two home run sermons on surrendering to Jesus in the midst of storms. I haven’t bothered to ask Jesus if he cares because I know he does, but I’ve spent a lot of time asking Jesus to calm this storm this week.
This led to some particularly beautiful conversations about how Jesus creatively calms storms. Like, on the boat, Jesus’s disciples woke him up and asked if he cared, but I don’t think they were asking for a miraculous calming – I think they were asking him to take a bucket and start bailing water with them. He went above and beyond. One of the creative solutions to my living situation would be a miraculous healing where I don’t need an accessible bathroom and single level home. Jesus, heal the storm! I’m pursuing multiple avenues simultaneously, and I’m so loved and know there are people around my church and around the world praying for me as we anticipate God showing up creatively.
I have offered a few options to God, but I also know he’s going to do what’s best for me. I’m so not stressed. I’m conscious of a ticking clock and being responsible with my actions, but it’s not the same as worrying about it. I would love a solution today, but as one of my friends pointed out, in six months time there will be a solution, and we will have to remember what a big storm this was for God to calm. Whatever the solution, I’m excited to testify that God took care of it because God takes care of me.
God opens doors and closes them. I have this beautiful red door I’ve used the past while because I said yes to God leading me to New Zealand. I don’t believe he’d bring me this far to shut me out again.
