“Smiling is my favorite.” Actually, no, full disclosure, I think laughing is my favorite.
Every semester my students ask me if they are my favorite. Like every good teacher, I tell them I don’t have favorite students or class periods. I did receive a huge compliment from a student today who admitted that despite her constant competition with a classmate to be my favorite student, I’m the first teacher who she has ever believed when I say I don’t have favorites. She went on to tell me that she recognized that I show my love for students in different ways because they are all different. After a crazy stressful week, that was a big uplift to my spirit.
I really do love each of my students, and I have to show my love differently. Some of them are a joy in class, and it’s easy to laugh with them or make cookies with them. Alternatively, I groan over others who are occasionally disrespectful or belligerent, but I don’t love them any less. By the grace of God, I can testify to the love that pulled me out of my own belligerence, and I want my students to see that in me. I hope that is visible for the student to whom I had to assign a difficult consequence this week just as much as for the two basketball players who asked to use their study hour after school Thursday to talk to me about the work of the Holy Spirit in the world today.
I can’t choose a favorite student from among these precious children any more than I can choose a favorite moment from this crazy stressful week seasoned with dozens of joyous experiences. An unfortunate incident last Friday led to a lot of disheartening emails and paperwork, and I had a phone call reminder Monday afternoon that I needed to go to REHAB for a urine sample this week which made for some high emotions as I tried to make it through the rest of my weekly responsibilities. Fortunately, I had some incredible walking with Cindy as she held one hand and I practiced walking with my second arm free. Margot and I reviewed some of the improvements I’ve had in the past couple years, and she spent time targeting specific muscles that she wants me to train to improve the quality of my walking. I showed off a little with Anja on Friday, and we’re beginning a new plan to advance my confidence in gross motor skills. After I demonstrated with her what I’d been practicing with Cindy, Anja walked me into the workout room and helped me onto the elliptical machine where I worked out for a few minutes.
Take a moment to let that sink in – a diagnosed paraplegic got on an elliptical and walked without incident for a few minutes. While I was moving my legs, I could feel different muscles activated that are often compensated for while I have the solid support of my sticks. Anja commented that anyone who saw me would never suspect I had any kind of SCI based on the ability I was demonstrating. But we weren’t done yet! After a short rest and a glass of water, Anja instructed me to practice kneeling and returning to a standing position with just the help of a stool. This is the first step in making sure I’m safe getting on and off the floor in a variety of circumstances yet to come.
Like I said, it’s difficult to choose which of those physical successes through the week would be my favorite, but I also had the joy of seeing Danai, Sabrina, and Marion at REHAB on Wednesday. Even though it was just for five minutes, I felt like I hit the jackpot with three of my four favorite nurses on duty. Plus I managed ninety percent of the conversation in German as two of them don’t speak any English. Speaking of speaking German, I also had a delightful evening yesterday at the Kandern choir’s Christmas party. Germans are really into their parties, and I’m still so amazed at the kindness extended to me by these women despite my slowness with their language. Gundi reassured me for the dozenth time that all the food was safe for me, and different friends took turns bringing and clearing my plates away and keeping my glass full as we laughed and talked and I tried to pick up a few more German or dialect words.
Yet another item on my list of blessings that I can’t rank as favorites were the number of emails I received with uplifting words. One of them was from a member of my sending church, and, as a missionary, I can tell you it’s an incredible blessing to have someone reach out and ask how they can pray for you. It’s hugely valuable to hear from people on my support team who are continuing to lift me up to the Lord. I also had a handful of emails from parents that were particularly encouraging. Full disclosure, I actually emailed about a dozen parents with the subject line “Positive News” to tell them how much I loved their kids just to make me feel happier after having to send a few difficult emails. While it had an instant effect of making me happy to share my genuine love of these kids, the responses reminded me that my ministry has a ripple effect in the lives of these parents. One emailed almost immediately a response that they were also praying for me and were grateful for my ministry. A second parent responded with thanks and told me she knew her son held me in high esteem. Multiple parents let me know this small encouragement from me made their day.
So back to laughing. My laugh is pretty recognizable – I’m pretty sure the 7th period art class was making fun of my laugh when they heard me down the hall in the ceramics room on Thursday. I love to laugh – loud, and long, and clear. Amidst all the craziness of my life – the paralysis, the grading, the NHS service project planning – laughter is important to me, but I want to be cautious with my superlatives. I think I’d be safer to revise my statement to say Jesus is my favorite, and I love when he laughs with me and cries with me.
This week, I’d ask for your ongoing prayers with me for every single one of my precious students as we enter in the final two weeks of school before Christmas break. Students tend to turn their brains off, but we have so much learning to accomplish left in my class. I’m also eager for your prayers that I would continue to see progress in my balance and walking – both literally and metaphorically.
