My father,
My grandfather,
My grandfather’s concubine
They said Your Name after encounters with different aspects of you:
The God who Sees, who Provides, who Is Faithful
Bless me
My brother didn’t understand what he gave me
I didn’t understand what I stole
But I wanted more of you
Bless me
My uncle didn’t know you but he could recognize you at work
He gave me love and money
But I wanted more
Bless me
Children are a joy and they multiply in my home like sheep
A nation comes from me
Who will they be
Bless me
All this good from the worldly things isn’t enough
I want to encounter you
Bless me
“Blessed to be a blessing”
You promised that before
This abundance isn’t enough
I want to share more
Bless me
I’ll fight you here, but not just for me
The wrestling match is an invitation
I won’t let go tonight until you
Bless me
The story starts where I thought it would end
The sun comes up and I’m limping again
I won’t forget how you continue to
Bless me
I won’t settle for less than intimacy
With a God who gives over abundantly
Now that I’ve seen that I’m ready to share how you
Bless me
It looks different than before
Because you actually love me more
You taught me generosity when you
Bless me
I’m still in brokenness
And you don’t love someone less
When I demand you
Bless me
There’s space for the world to thrive
We don’t have to barely survive
I can keep seeking you
LORD, bless me
I spent a lot of time Wednesday evening praying for a person who represents a lot of hurt in my life – he’s hurt people I care about, strongly offended me, and is closely associated with others who’ve deeply hurt me and some of the closest people to me. We aren’t exactly friends. But I couldn’t shake that God was asking me to pray for him and expect radical transformation in his life. I woke up at 3am and felt like God was wrestling with him that night. I prayed for three hours and wrote this poem.
It’s about Jacob. It’s about this guy. It’s about me. It’s about a God who is bigger than my theology and tells me to ask for miraculous heart change in people who don’t come across as kind or caring to me. It’s about stepping out in faith to let God keep transforming my heart to love him and love others better and to receive good gifts that Jesus says he wants to give me – blessings beyond what I could ask or imagine.
