Last week was busy, and I have no actual excuse for not posting. I just was tired after church and took a nap. I had a few things to say about my week, but they aren’t as relevant now that another week has gone by. One bit that lingered though is the idea of the intentionality and carefulness with which I want to post on the internet. Two weeks ago, a corner of the internet was in upheaval over an influencer changing course on the public trajectory they’d built a following around. It was hard to watch, and I processed with a friend who’d been a follower and knew more details than I did. We were both sad that the comment section was a hot mess.
Then this week another famous person – who I’ve actually met and highly respect – was in headlines over a moral failing. A different friend reached out with a question about how do we as Christians respond when this is in house over an issue we consider important. Where is the line between repentant sinner and irredeemable leader? There are a whole lot of details I don’t know about the situations that are being broadcast, and I really do want to stress that the internet doesn’t know the full details of real people’s real lives, but also a weird post came across my feed yesterday as the algorithm clearly picked up on my recent replays of RAYE’s new album “THIS MUSIC MAY CONTAIN HOPE.” My girl knows what’s up. So RAYE is a world famous London born singer skipping around all the chat shows and picking up all the recent music awards who is featured on a Relevant Magazine Instagram post from yesterday that is just her face and her quote “I look for answers in the Bible app, not Instagram.”
I closed the tab when I saw it.
By the grace of God, I’m not a famous person, and I low key hope I never will be. But as I shared recently with a friend, I also know I write things on the internet, and while my steady readership is closer to 100, it’s still public information when I click post. I want to be known for pointing people to Jesus. I’ve been, in that sense, some kind of influence for a couple of decades. I was reflecting with a friend who I was an early youth leader with, and we were talking about two particular youth we mentored who have walked away from Jesus. We did the best we could to show them Jesus is a better way, but for various reasons, they disagreed. I also have names of other students who have made a similar choice to walk way. And here I am still journeying with Jesus, and I believe am a better and more purposeful representative of him.
Admittedly, I do some things differently in mentoring and pastoring contexts now than a few years ago. Even now, I get things wrong, and I need to repent and grow. I want to be regular with sharing updates on my life, but I know some of the stories I shared in the past are not how I would do things again, and it’s honestly a little cringe to have them out there. I don’t want to scrub the history though. I own it. I want to be marked by a trajectory of living more like Jesus.
Another angle of this I was discussing with an American was trying to explain the concept of ‘mana’ from Māori culture. I was telling her about a couple of people in New Zealand who carry this mana which equates to the weight of spiritual maturity and responsibility that gives them a lot of respect in Christian circles. That’s still a pretty clunky explanation, and I was lamenting how there were no examples I could name in the American context of Christians with mana ecumenically. But when I say Mike Dodge or Hannah Cossey, people in Canterbury, New Zealand know exactly what I’m talking about.
And this story was about how Mike and Hannah and another friend Vicky prayed with me on Thursday. Mike Dodge is passionate about introducing young people to Jesus because he knows Jesus is a better way. Mike has given his life to serve Jesus and has seen countless thousands of young people encounter Jesus through Easter Camp. Mike isn’t blue check verified on the socials creating an image of himself. Mike is far, far more concerned about using his weighty influence to pray for people, disciple them, and encourage them to serve Jesus. Mike is real, and his influence is massive. Immeasurable, really. But what I love most about Mike and being influenced by Mike, is that he genuinely loves Jesus and loves people.
There’s a bit of a funny joke in my will about what my eulogy will be, and as of last week I’ve given permission for a loved one to add a second hilarious line, but I also hope that beyond the laughs in any memorial, the lasting influence I have is that some people scattered around the world are closer to Jesus because they were influenced in some small way by me.
